WALL OF POETRY
I’ve realized something important;
It doesn’t matter how miserable my life has been
Stop re-opening the wounds
Life goes on whether I want it to or not
As long as I've accomplished something
And the world knows my name,
What is the point of dwelling in the past?
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You seem to be enjoying this aren’t you,
A simple sliver of masochism
You love seeing my blood boil
And my veins get hot
The piercing words that will come out of my mouth
Begging you to leave me alone
You’re a sadist, aren’t you?
I hope you enjoy it;
Convincing yourself of your own sanity
Narcissism doesn’t seem fun
Doesn’t it?
I bet your life is hard,
When you’re willing to hear me insult your every being
Just to fulfill something within you,
That wants to be abused
I hope you enjoy it because this is your last time
You’ll hear me curse you and the world
Because I'm so close, to leaving you in my past
Where your narcissism belongs,
You’re masochistic
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It is not real, it is like a reality that is virtual;
And nothing exists
Because my brain does not believe it,
Under any circumstance
And because my thoughts are obfuscated …
There is no reality that tells me otherwise
Because my reality is created by myself
Henceforth,
It is the only thing I will create in my world of
Distortion and impending doom
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I wish the best for you,
Maybe one day you can fill the void in your heat
Maybe one day, you can be satisfied with yourself
Possibly, one day you can see yourself in the mirror
And see that I saw nothing wrong with you
One day, you can let go of envy
And see someone could love you,
For you
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Where am I expecting to go?
If I simply never change
I put the same implication into the world,
And it's the same outcome
And I assume everyone will be the same
All I assume is, that it will be the same outcome,
Each and every time
And I realize this,
But I never change
I repeat the same thoughts,
I repeat the same actions
And I wrote this,
Because I never change
It’s ironic, because the thoughts, I wrote down
Did not change
I’m sitting here wanting to change,
Maybe If I want to change,
That’s different
I think I have to change
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The rigid fences, and the deep contrast in the sky
The man was in wry
The angular buildings in the distance
The outline of a man
Laying back, in his rocking chair
Back and forth, full of anxiety
In limerance, he comes to the conclusion it used to be clear
Now full of fear
The smoke that fills the atmosphere will
Adhere to your lungs
He continues to stare and watch,
Watching for the fog to dissipate
But as time goes by, and the oxygen depletes
His will to see it changing is in a state of sedate
He comes to the conclusion
There is no other way of life
In these empty fields except for a state of desolate
And he’ll sit here day by day,
Watching for the atmosphere to change, alone
He’ll sit here, every single day, in the same exact place, watching the same fog, exit the same building day by day
And to the man’s dismay,
He and the environment he sits in, a coalesce of terror and fright
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I know who I am,
Who are you?
I don’t derive my sense of self from other people
It’s from myself, me, who I am
I know what I like to do,
Who I am,
My hobbies, passions,
Who are you?
Do you know who you are?
Or you want to sit behind that mask
And chop up everyone’s reality into bits
To make your perceived reality, fit in that little box,
Inside of your head?
Don’t worry, it’ll be fine for me
Because when I left you, I always knew who I am
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I remember the things people say, I remember everything
I remember how it felt,
And every single word has a feeling
Every millisecond of life has a feeling
Some might say, feelings are nothing but an expression;
They are not physical,
But I see the words, and things people say
And they strike me to the core
I can forget, but I can never forget how it felt
When someone experiences that emotion
I felt it as if it was my own
I can see through the eyes of a psychopath
And its empty
But some people don’t understand the way I feel
And most won't because I see a feeling in everything
Even in objects
It scares me because I don’t know what is going on
I don’t understand why anything or everything exists
I’m too stupid to fix the world’s problems