13 signs you’re dealing with a complete loser
- Doesn’t accept responsibility in their life and blames others for their issues and shortcomings
Their relationships always fail, they wonder why everyone seems to ghost them, block them or avoid them. They keep shallow relationships going, and everyone seems to avoid them. At first, people think they’re cool, and they want to get to know them. Soon, their mask slips, and those people see who that loser really is. When people push them away, they just blame the world. “Everyone is against me”, “everything is everyone else’s fault”... No it’s not, you’re just a loser who refuses to look within themselves.
- Thinks they’re never going to die; wasting time on things that don’t matter
They waste their time hooking up, keeping bad friends around, and let the past of their horrible experiences of people mark the future for them. They'll sit and play on their PS4 9 hours a day instead of passing their classes. They have 124 hours on destiny this week alone. They party instead of getting a good job, waste their 30’s with pointless crap, sitting at a bar, and when they get old, they wonder why they’re broke with no one. We get it, when you’re in your teens and early 20’s you want to screw around. But, after a couple years in your 20s, grow up loser. You’re 25 without a job living in your parents basement. You’re 35, broke, living paycheck to paycheck without a partner, and you spent the 10 years to discover yourself on pointless activities that amounted to nothing whatsoever. You’re too old to bring someone to hookup with in your parents basement. Get a grip on your life, nothing you are doing is fulfilling.
- They never grow up and refuse to see the consequences of their actions
After they cheated during their exam, they blame their professor “his class is too hard” “the professor is just singling me out”. They spent their life partying with no job, and their parents kicked them out. They're 45, without a job, wondering why they aren't making OnlyFans money anymore, and when you google them there's pictures of them getting down with an 80 year old man because their self esteem hit rock bottom. They cheated on their spouse, they used a man who loved them for money, they beat their kids, they abused their boyfriend, and they all have something in common. They won’t accept responsibility, because that means their fantasy of being “perfect” isn’t true. They aren’t a “god” in their own eyes, because they’re extremely flawed, more than most people. It’s all just a ploy to hide their extremely down-in-the-dumps self-esteem and shame. They cannot deal with normal occurrences, because their life has to be “perfect”.
- The world revolves around them
I must speak to the manager because I want 3 sugar packs in my coffee instead of 4. My wife won’t have sex with me because I won’t take a shower. Maybe, put yourself in the place of the other people, and think about why it isn’t working out for you! You aren’t a 5-year-old child, you’re a grown person. No one is responsible for meeting your needs.
- Refuses to change, they wonder why “bad things” always seem to happen to them
They think they have to constantly be defensive or else people will take “advantage” of them. Instead of resolving their childhood trauma, or possibly relieving themselves of shame during negative life occurrences, they mistreat others, people leave them, and they simply just don’t want to understand why someone doesn’t want to be around a miserable asshole. They must incessantly be the center of attention to fill the void in their heart.
- Pushes everyone in their life away that cares about them because of their low self-esteem; criticizes you constantly, but the world is over if anything is wrong with them
After they treated their friend like absolute shit, they wonder why they “don’t want to talk about it” or meet their family. After that person says they aren’t interested in continuing the friendship or relationship, they gaslight and criticize that person, they shame and guilt them into continuing to be around them because they’re simply so miserable. They can’t live without external validation for a single day.
- They want their cake and eat it too, they’re too good to work
They don’t want to get a job, they want to be a famous artist, but they’ll smoke weed in the studio and get drunk, then pay $200 an hour to sit around not recording the song that will get them famous. They’re simply “on another level”, you just wouldn’t understand anyway.
- They think miracles will happen
They just got accepted into medical school. They have an exam coming up. It’s worth 60% of their grade, they haven’t shown up to any classes, or studied. They still think they’ll pass that exam with their laziness.
- If they can’t control you, you’re the problem
Once they realize you aren’t going to sit there and be a piece of crap they can step all over, they’ll discard you. Why would they keep someone around who isn’t going to make them feel good all day? They’ll blame you, rage, get pissed, and lose it, why? Because they’re so self-centered, they could never understand why you aren’t their trash who takes a god’s orders from them.
- Their self-esteem is so low, they don’t even know why you like them
They simply have no idea why you want to be friends with them, or be in a relationship with them. They act like they’re the catch, and they’re better than you. But deep down, it’s hiding the drilled in shame, that dictates all their behavior. They believe they are deeply flawed, broken, and repulsive, but they’ll never admit that. They won’t admit or heal from the traumatic experience, which causes them to operate on guilt and shame. They have no sense of self, they derive theirs from other people. They’ll say “you don’t truly love me”. They want a relationship badly, but they hate themselves so much, they believe you will betray them, or deep down you don’t care about them. They’ll hurt other people because they must destroy anything that isn’t full of misery. They are extremely weak minded, they allowed something to die within them, their humanity is lost.
- Inflexible, your schedule does not matter
You told them you have a meeting on Monday, but they’ll invite you to their son’s birthday party. They just don’t care, if you don’t show up you’re the bad guy. Remember, they’re the center of the universe.
13. A perpetual state of victimhood; snowflake-ism
Everything and anyone offends me. I let people walk all over me because I am a spineless jellyfish. My ex spent the last 8 years abusing me, yet when someone talks badly about them, I will defend them like they are my god, and I am their full-time pro bono lawyer. Stole from me? I guess I am fine with it because I don’t want to hurt your “feelings”. I push everyone away in my life so you nor me has to become offended. I just wish I was a child again because the harsh reality is too much for me to handle. I refuse to grow up, because that will mean I have to take some sort of responsibility for my life…
Who are losers? They're everywhere, they are especially narcissists. They can also be regular people, who walk down the street. How do you deal with a loser? Leave them, they will simply NEVER learn. Don't try to fix them, when it doesn't work, they'll blame you. The only way they will change, is when they get karma so bad, they'll have to admit something is deeply wrong with their character. Move on, cut contact, and never think of the loser; that's how you beat them, they live off attention.
Author and publisher @Lobonewyork, 7/4/2022